Cigarette: A pinch of tobacco rolled
in paper with
fire at one end and fool on the
other.
Lecture: An art of transferring
information from
the notes of the lecturer to the
notes of the
students without passing through
"the minds of
either"
Conference: The confusion of one
man multiplied
by the number present.
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Compromise: The art of dividing a
cake in such a
way that everybody believes he
got the biggest
piece
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Tears: The hydraulic force by which
masculine
will-power is defeated by feminine
tear power...
in paper with
fire at one end and fool on the
other.
Lecture: An art of transferring
information from
the notes of the lecturer to the
notes of the
students without passing through
"the minds of
either"
Conference: The confusion of one
man multiplied
by the number present.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Compromise: The art of dividing a
cake in such a
way that everybody believes he
got the biggest
piece
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Tears: The hydraulic force by which
masculine
will-power is defeated by feminine
tear power...
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Marriage: It's an agreement in
which a man loses
his bachelor degree and woman
gains her
master.
which a man loses
his bachelor degree and woman
gains her
master.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Office: A place where you can relax
after your
strenuous home life.
after your
strenuous home life.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Etc: A sign to make others believe
that you know
more than you actually do.
that you know
more than you actually do.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Experience: The name men give to
their
mistakes.
Atom Bomb: An invention to end
all inventions.
Philosopher: A fool who torments
himself during
life, to be spoken of when dead.
Diplomat: A person who tells you to
go to hellin
such a way that you actually look
forward to the
trip.
Opportunist: A person who starts
taking bath if
he accidentally falls into a river.
Optimist: A person who while
falling from Eiffel
tower says in midway "See I am
not injured
yet."
Miser: A person who lives poor so
that he can
die rich.
Father: A banker provided by
nature.
Criminal: A guy no different from
the rest..
except that he got caught.
Boss: Someone who is early when
you are late
and late when you are early.
Politician: One who shakes your
hand before
elections and your Confidence
after
their
mistakes.
Atom Bomb: An invention to end
all inventions.
Philosopher: A fool who torments
himself during
life, to be spoken of when dead.
Diplomat: A person who tells you to
go to hellin
such a way that you actually look
forward to the
trip.
Opportunist: A person who starts
taking bath if
he accidentally falls into a river.
Optimist: A person who while
falling from Eiffel
tower says in midway "See I am
not injured
yet."
Miser: A person who lives poor so
that he can
die rich.
Father: A banker provided by
nature.
Criminal: A guy no different from
the rest..
except that he got caught.
Boss: Someone who is early when
you are late
and late when you are early.
Politician: One who shakes your
hand before
elections and your Confidence
after
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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